A recent person who has impacted my life - August 27

 Prompt Response: Someone who has left a lasting impact on me recently is once again my ex. In the last post I talked about how I felt about the breakup and how I still loved him even after like 2 months of the break up but then once summer break came along I started to forget about him and just moved on from him completely. I remember during the summer I was watching every Marvel movie in existence, I know its off topic but just hear me out, after watching every single movie off Marvel not only did I realize 2 things, one I shouldn’t stop doing stuff of what I like from a guy, and two I gotta stop acting like the love interests from the movies if I want the “perfect” man for me. When I was with my ex, I stopped doing everything I loved and having my own opinions, like if he loved D.C., I had to watch D.C movies and not Marvel, if he was homophobic I had to say I was homophobic so he would be satisfy, and I remember one night he even said this to me, “once we get married and have kids, you will have to become a house wife”, and that's when I started to realize he wasn’t for me, not including all the bad things that came after that. With my second point, I also realized that I should stop acting so desperate and needy for a man if I want the “ideal guy”, for me because love like actual, true, long lasting love comes unexpectedly not forcefully or filled with lies, and honestly I still have hope of this type of love and I still want it especially with the world we live in, and especially when I didn’t had the chance to see that with my parents. Overall my ex has left me a huge impact on my life, sure he came back to Georgia, sure he’s in my 4th period now, but if there are 2 things I learned from him is that I don’t want a guy to date me out of pity and that I’m the true gem for anyone that he lost because right now he’s the one still heartbroken with his rebound girl just like Pique, while I’m out here living my life just like Shakira.



Summary: Today in class we were finishing up the heart sheet and also did a Commonlit for another poem of Emily Dickinson called, “Her Sweet Weight on My Heart a Night”.



Reflection: Reading this poem feels like waking up from a dream about someone you fantasize over and then realize, they aren’t real or taken and that does hurt, don't get me wrong. It’s also insane how Emily Dickinson knows how to capture that bittersweet feeling between what’s real and what you desperately wish it was real. 

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